Got to take it one day at a time Tap. Thats all You can do. I can't imagine Your pain. We are here for You. Never forget that. I know it would not even make a dent knowing this. You are doing great for what You are going through. Keep it up. We know its tough and only a few of us may know how tough. I know I don't and hope I never find out. One day the pain will dull some but You have to get there and no one knows when that day will be. we are thinking of You and you are in our prayers. hang in there. There is an end to the severeness of this pain. Then You will be able to concentrate on honoring Her every chance You get. Good Luck My friend.Ed