I got it!! Let the boys be yalls guide fer the day. Make em the boss. Act like you don't know nuthin bout nuthin and ask lots of questions like "All right capt's, where y'all gonna carry me and yo momma to catch some feshes today?" and what poles do I use and can y'all rig these fer us?" then askem if this guided trip includes samiches and diet cokes.
Wait.......... that's a normal trip fer you. You in trouble.

No wait... I got it. Tell her you gonna carry bigger with y'all so you can show him how to fesh. Let bigger and the boys do all the feshin while you splainin what they doin. Dang it that won't work either. When they start ketchin feshes you'll be lost.

You better just tell her you got an end of the month audit and got to work and Feelay will be takin yo spot as capt'n of the ship. Least that way when she decides to go back into the shady cove everything will be taken care of.

Sorry this is so long, but with your inept abilities it's hard to help you out.

Course you could just blame it on me that you ain't got no seat post and the boT ain't ready.