Thread: Contest

Ok, one more just for insurance:

DD is a Sasquatch sniffing, waffle house-ian, village people loving gewber.

Wannabe...

Originally Posted by Rooleyt

Now this is a story I have to share with you fellers. One day my ole dog Tater and I done planned us a fishing trip on the Tenn-Tom. Now ole Tater he ain’t much fer hunting and sech but he’s one jam up good crappie dog. Now I know that don’t carry weight most places but Tater can smell out slab crappie like ole Obama can tell lies. Well about 3 am that morning we load up in my ole pick em up truck and head west. We stop at the local Waffle house and get Tater his usual pancakes & sausage and head on out to Pratts landing and you know that rascal would not share nary crumb with me. We get’s to the landing about 4:30 and ole Tater he backs me in the water and parks da truck. He takes his place on the bow of the boat, where he navigates from. When his tail starts wagging I know that’s where the big slabs are. Well we’ve been running about 45 minutes and I get’s to wondering cause ole Tater ain’t never took this long to spot a good feeshing hole before. I slow down and asks him why we going so far today. He just looks at me with those sad eyes and turns back around like I was dummy for asking him such a foolish question.. I say to myself, self, he never been wrong before so here we go into new fishing territory.

Finally after nuder 20 minutes that tail starts to wagging. I shut the motor down and get on the trolling motor. I say alright tater get me on dem slabs. Well weez got us a kind of signal, when he barks once I know to feesh rat dare. If he barks twice just keep going. Well sho nuff one barks comes, finally. By this time it’s just breaking daylight and I can just make out the shape of trees. I grabs my trusty ole cane pole and slip one uv them dough belly minners on there getting ready. I see ole tater looking off to the right but can’t spot zactly whar the top is to drop that dough belly minner. About that time tater he stands up on his hind legs and starts making all kinda crazy sounds like he don lost his mind. I say tater, you don gone crazy dog and then it hits me, the most god awful smell I have every smelt in my life. Tater he done lep over my head to da back of the boat and he ain’t neber don dat befo for sho. As I was turning to see what he was up to I noticed from the corner of my eye dis big harry looking thang about 5 foots away with his arms opened wide leaning out over the water. I said oh my it’s one of dem dare sasquath thingy’s I done heard about. Bout dat time it let out a big ole squeal. I look and tater done jumped in da water and swimming away, he done abandoned me and left me to fend for myself. Well the only weapons I had were a BB pistol and a beaver stick about 5 foot long. I grabbed that stick and pistol. Then dat thang done let out another squeal and I commenced to whipping dat thang with da stick and shooting him with my BB pistol. Not sure if I was doing any good but I wuz a trying to keep dat thang off me. Well bout then sumthin came at me an hit me in da head. Out da boat I went squealing like a little girl knowding I was a goner. Bout 2 or 1 minute later after I had got up on the edge of the boat it was daylight enough to see thangs. I looked and what I had thought was a big feet , saquatch thingy was actually a willer tree leaning out over the water with all da leaves beat off it. The squeal I heard wuz an ole screech owl dat had landed in another tree close by. There I was all wet, lost a good BB pistol an broke a good beaver stick to boot all because of a willer tree & whoot owl. Ole Tater, dare he was on the bank looking at me like I don lost my mind. I climb back over into da boat and go pick up Tater ofn da bank. Being it was cold I told tater we’d best go home and call it a day with no feesh. We gets da boat back on the trailer and Tater he listens to dem Village People, sumthin bout the alphabet , YMCA on the 8 track all da way home. I got to thanking about that smell and den I remember that Tater let out them bad smells every dang time he has pancakes & sausage. Now dat’s the story as I recollect!

Uh oh, not one werd about them village people!!!


Big River Marine
Bill Burnett
870-635-0202
Member-- Tri-State Crappie Anglers
Pro Staff-- Southern Pro Tackle, Meatgetter Jigs, Minner Critters, Ozark Rods, and Crappieholic Apparel.

Originally Posted by BigRiverMarine

Uh oh, not one werd about them village people!!!


Big River Marine
Bill Burnett
870-635-0202
Member-- Tri-State Crappie Anglers
Pro Staff-- Southern Pro Tackle, Meatgetter Jigs, Minner Critters, Ozark Rods, and Crappieholic Apparel.

Ah, yes there is read it again...its at the end.. dog listening to the village people on 8 track

Member, Tri State Crappie Anglers

Oh yeah, I didn't read it far enough. Guess I didn't hit the more button!! Thanks for keeping me straight!!! Yer good at that. Lol


Big River Marine
Bill Burnett
870-635-0202
Member-- Tri-State Crappie Anglers
Pro Staff-- Southern Pro Tackle, Meatgetter Jigs, Minner Critters, Ozark Rods, and Crappieholic Apparel.

Well I decided I was going to go fishing down in Mississippi finally with Rees Guide. Well Rees was kind of tied up on the first day so I went on down towards Richland, Mississippi to check on the Hales Fireworks store. Well I stopped off in Jackson, MS at the Waffle House and guess who I ran into? Yep old DonDon, he was eating some breakfast with WB, Major, Gator, Minnerman and Tritonman. Like a dumbie I asked WB, the one fish wonder, for a fishing report and all he could talk about was watching DonDon on stage the night before at the Village People concert! I guess DonDon took off his shirt and started stripping off his clothes for the crowd! And when the men in the crowd starting throwing money up on stage, that’s when him and WB had gotten thrown out of the place. Little known to WB it seems the place the concert was being held at was a gay bar! The only reason WB had asked DonDon to go along was because he had gotten free tickets from a radio station.

Well then old Gator speaks up and says boys I have heard that old Sasquatch has been sleeping in a hollow tree down towards Richland. A buddy had told him about where the place was. Well DonDon, says DW you got the keys to that fireworks store, maybe we can get some smoke balls to smoke him out. I want to get a picture of him and become world famous! Well I said boys I came down here to fish and not deal with Sasquatch but I will run over to the store with Minnerman, Tritonman, and Major and get some smoke balls! Well we get over to the store and Minnerman, Tritonman, Major and I decide we are not going to get old DonDon any smoke balls, we are going to give him Kryptonite instead. Well we meet back up with WB, DonDon and Gator. We tell them we are all going fishing up at Grenada. We all get motel rooms and have the most wonderful afternoon fishing ever! Major, Minner and Triton all show me the tricks to catching Mississippi Crappie. We all limit out and I catch my first 3 pounder. That evening I take everyone out for dinner.

Well as we are all setting there at the eating joint! And CNN comes on with a news story about 3 guys coming into contact with Sasquatch. Well it seems that DonDon decides that Gator should throw into the hollow tree the so called smoke balls after WB lights them and DonDon will take a picture when Sasquatch comes out. Well according to CNN, 3 Kryptonite balls were thrown into the tree and they blew up. Well its seems that they burned a large circle on Sasquatch’s butt. He comes out and chases Gator and DonDon. Well old DonDon drops the camera and WB picks it up and takes a picture of a bare butted Sasquatch chasing DonDon and Gator up a tree.
WB becomes world famous, goes out on speaking tours all over the world and becomes rich. It seems that Sasquatch was so mad he takes his own pictures of DonDon and Gator up in a tree and gets rich selling the pictures to Fox News! DonDon decides never again to trust me giving him any fireworks!

Shirley I have won by now.

Donate my prize to the judge. They deserve it for having to read all this drivel. Pffft.

Wannabe...

I just want to thank Donnie for coming up with this contest... The stories are very entertaining... Great idea Donnie....

Member, Tri State Crappie Anglers

Originally Posted by Wannabe...

Shirley I have won by now.

Donate my prize to the judge. They deserve it for having to read all this drivel. Pffft.

Wannabe...

You didn't win I did!


And Yikess and Major liked my story so much that they decided to have everyone dress in costume for the FJS championship. This ought to be interesting!

Member, Tri State Crappie Anglers