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Thread: The new TEN commandments......

  1. #1
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    Default The new TEN commandments......


    Commandment 1
    Marriages are made in heaven
    But then again, so is thunder and lightning.

    Commandment 2
    If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say,
    Talk in your sleep.

    Commandment 3
    Marriage is grand - and divorce is at least a 100 grand!

    Commandment 4
    Married life is very frustrating.
    In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
    In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
    In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

    Commandment 5
    When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing:
    Either the car is new or the wife is.

    Commandment 6
    Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
    The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

    Commandment 7
    Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said.
    After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

    Commandment 8
    Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook.
    But the law allows only one wife.

    Commandment 9
    Marriage and love are purely a matter of chemistry.
    That is why one treats the other like toxic waste.

    Commandment 10
    A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

    Bonus Commandment Story A long married couple came upon a wishing well.
    The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
    The husband decided to make a wish too.
    But he leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.
    The wife was stunned for a moment, but then smiled, “It really works!” :p

  2. #2
    Billbob's Avatar
    Billbob is offline Crappie.com Legend - 2013 Guber Of The Year * Crappie.com Supporter
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    good 1
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  3. #3
    gabowman is offline Super Moderator * Crappie.com Supporter
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    Good one.:D I circulated that one thru to all my email friends too.

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    My Dad always told me when you get married the first 6 months you could just eat her up and the next 6 months you will wish you had.

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    I always try to bring a smile to your faces. It's my mission in life!

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    Quote Originally Posted by creekslick View Post
    My Dad always told me when you get married the first 6 months you could just eat her up and the next 6 months you will wish you had.
    Good one!!!!!

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    Ya'll should have married up like me, then you wouldn't have all these problems.

    Wannabe...
    Wannabe...v2.0
    A lot like the old Wannabe... except with fewer bad words. And Karate chop action. But, yes, still purtier than you.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Wannabe... View Post
    Ya'll should have married up like me, then you wouldn't have all these problems.

    Wannabe...
    And be a YES MAN?

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  9. #9
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    Dont you mean a YES MAM MAN!
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    Quote Originally Posted by satdoc1 View Post
    Dont you mean a YES MAM MAN!
    That's hitting the nail right there. You pegged it Sat

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