Wake up everyone…

[BuckeyeCrappie]

3 brothers were talking about their mom who is now elderly and almost blind. The one brother said:
”Im going to buy Mom a house”
The second brother said, “ I’m going to buy Mom a car”.
The third brother said, “You know, Mom is almost blind. She can hardly see a thing. She loved to read. She’d read 2-3 books a week and she misses a good book. So I bought her a parrot that can read. He’ll read books to Mom all day”.

Well, about a week later they all got thank you notes from Mom.
The first said, “ Bill, thanks for the house but it’s too big”.
The second said, “ Jim, thanks for the car but it’s too small”.
The third note said, “Bob, that was the best tasting chicken I’ve ever had. Thanks!”.

[BuckeyeCrappie]

[Clint]

A farmer was driving his truck full of vegetables to the city to sell them. On the way he gets a flat tire. So, he pulls over and gets out his jack and lug wrench and proceeds to change the tire. As he takes off each lug nut, he puts them in the hub cap he took off the wheel. He is almost finished, and a car comes by at a high speed and barely clips the hub cap and sends all the lug nuts flying. He is at a loss as to what he is going to next. From behind the chain link fence, he is parked next to comes a voice. The farmer now sees that he parked right next to an insane asylum. The fellow behind the fence who has been watching the whole affair says “Just take one lug nut off each of the other wheels and put them on the wheel you just changed. Then you can safely drive on into the city and buy some new lug nuts to replace the ones that you lost. The farmer says “That’s a great idea. You saved my day.” Then he said to the guy “You must work in this asylum since you are so smart.” The guy replies “Nope, I’m patient here.” The farmer asked, “How can you be in there if you are so smart?” The guy replies “I’m crazy, not stupid.”.

[BuckeyeCrappie]

[zummy]

Here ya go

Sent from my SM-G991U using Tapatalk

[6poundtest]

Morton was reading the paper after breakfast when he came across an article about a beautiful actress who was about to marry a football player known primarily for his lack of IQ and common sense.

He turned to his wife with a questioning look on his face and said: "I'll never understand why the biggest j*rks get the most attractive wives."

His wife smiled and replied: "Why thank you, dear!

[BobC]

A great bunch this morning! Thanks guys!
Bob

[Barnacle Bill]

[Mstr Dan]

I sure the kid said but I touched it with my finger but it didn’t open


Sent from my iPhone using Crappie.com Fishing mobile app

[chaunc]