If Little Debbie's and a Dr Pepper won't make the fish bite, pick up your cell phone and call your wife. This move will almost ensure that every pole that has a hook in the water will instantly have a fish on it! With your wife on the phone you can't just lay the phone down and start pulling in fish. You must first explain to her why you must quickly get off the phone to retrieve said fish. She will explain that you don't spend hours talking to her on the phone as you did when you were dating her and that you must not love her as much as you once did as you would rather have a bunch of fish near you instead of talking to her.
You will consider hanging up and calling her later and trying to explain the "dropped call" but you know it won't work as your phone "drops" a call near every time you talk to her. Once you have explained the importance of the fish in the tournament (prize money) you will finally get off the phone only to find all the fish are no longer on the hooks and all you have left is 8 lines in one big knot!
Make sure you didn't forget to tell her you love her before you hang up, or about the time you get all your poles straightened out the phone will ring......