Thread: The Crappie Ninja episode I

We hit the water and the winds were again as unpredictable as a rigged roulette wheel. East at 20, west at 18 gusting to 32. What we need is some luck with this weather I exclaimed as my hat blew off for the 3rd time. "Young glass hoppa not one with elements" the Crappie Ninja Master said as another one of his slabs thuthumped it's way into the boat. "Young glass hoppa learn way of deadriest catch while fish with two poles". As I pondered the wisdom of fishing with two poles in this type of wind a butterfly began to fight the wind appearing to be trying to make its way to the sampan. My heart raced with excitement because there is no better mojo than a butterfly landing near you while fishing. This I had found out while ready a Crappie Pro post in 2010. The butterfly made its way closer and closer to the sampan and suddenly I found the butterfly sitting on my hand. Ah Ha it has happened. The butterfly mojo is mine. I eagerly gazed toward the tip of the rod expecting it to dip with the weight of a monster slab at any time. Suddenly the tip of the rod dipped with the weight of a monster slab, but it was not my rod. It was the rod of the CNM again!!! Another slab on and me with the butterfly mojo....where was that butterfly? Suddenly I spied the butterfly underneath the CNM's seat slowly flapping his wings and occasionally looking my way with a smug little butterfly look. THAT LOW DOWN TWO TIMING LITTLE BUTTERFLY had seen a slab on the CNM's pole and quickly changed ends of the boat thinking perhaps he would get credit for the catch. Why you traitor I exclaimed as I made swipes at his little head with the 12' BBUL pole tipped with the Nimr Pecial.

to be continued in The Crappie Ninja episode IIIIIIIIII subtitled The Finale

loving this thread! in desperate need of a CNM myself!

Glasshoppa,
You weren't around when CrappiePro had us all thinking chickens were lucky. It has to be a red rooster crowing if I remember right.
DP

As we continued to fish, I noticed that the CNM was fishing with 2 poles, locating positions with an Etrex handheld gps, watching the 597di sonar, steering with one foot and with the other foot adjusting the motor speed due to the gusting wind conditions. As he put us on more structure and announced "honorable stake bed in 17 feet of water and lay in direction of setting sun, fish glass hoppa fish, chop chop", I suspected that the feats he was performing would be impossible to the average fisherman. A glance around the lake confirmed my suspicions since no boats were in sight having left the lake for a day with better conditions. As I looked at the CNM and his movements, the view of him seemed to be in slow motion as in viewing a gunfight scene from the movie The Matrix. Since needing to do more tasks than the available physical resources, he used the mental power of a CNM to suspend equipment in the air while attending to other required tasks needing performed to have a successful fishing trip on that day. I quickly grabbed the camera and began to click off shot after shot which amazingly when developed came back as a blur of motion. As the final picture on the roll of film was snapped, I finally captured the suspended etrex in the air while the CNM's other hands and feet were occupied with other tasks. Again, as on the previous day, the CNM soon proclaimed "20 honorable fish have I placed into the box, how many have you"? "Ereven" I answered fudging the number slightly and noticing I had began to pick up a strange sounding accent. "Fish, glass hoppa, fish, today you catch rimit". I replied sorrowfully to the CNM "today, I must give up". "Why, young glass hoppa? Sun on east horizon very row. It is not the way of a crappie ninja to give up so early". So I began to explain to the CNM. "Wife like to fish very much. Wife wish to make trip back to Nimrod. So I tell wife I go across state to chase women. If I stay full two day, wife know I tell lie and am fishing Nimrod. She know at my age, glass hoppa only able to chase women one day". "You no become Crappie Ninja today, only level 3 perch jerk" the CNM replied. "Glass hoppa hone skill and come back when learn skill better". As I turned away and made my way to my junk, a tear rolled down my cheek as I realized I had not achieved ninja status, but after making a couple of steps, I began to smile. What had honorable Crappie Ninja Master said? Come back after honing my skills and do it again. Ah yes, things could be worse.

The END

Thanks to Nimrod who put up with my craziness for a couple days and worked hard to put us on lots of fish. I picked up many tips from a "Master" crappie fisherman that can be applied to any lake anywhere. To get to spend time on a lake with a fisherman of this caliber was a real treat. All who have fished with Nimrod know that the hookset and landing of his crappie is an amazing thing to behold and up till this trip I had never seen anything like it. I am anxious to get back to this central arkansas lake, not just for the fishing, but for the comraderie of friends.

Thanks for treating me like royalty Buddy. Hope I can return the favor before too long.

Of course, I want to thank my kind and loving wife, who is also my fishing buddy. I often say that if it wasn't for her, I would be fishing off the bank in my skivvies with a cane pole. Baby, I love you, and I promise that we will get to Nimrod together soon. Thanks for telling me to go and have a good time which, as you can tell, I did.

I hope all have enjoyed. I have attempted to write in the past and here are some links to previous work that you may find humorous, at least in part.

http://www.crappie.com/crappie/arkan...ooo-tired.html

http://www.crappie.com/crappie/arkan...ek-part-i.html

I have found that my best proof reading comes approximately 30 seconds after the ability to edit ceases. I did go back and skim the older stories where I found lots of mistakes I never realized I had made. Oh well...

Again, thanks to all who commented and made writing this worthwhile.

Weed hopper glad you write much better than fish. Lesson # 2 you must fish blindfolded , stand on one foot on stump..Rofl You must bring honorable better half to fish next time even if she out fish you.

Thanks RCC, I enjoyed 111 and 11111111, and 11111111111 very much. Hopefully, next visit I will get to wet a line with you............PlEEEEEEZE don't expect to catch'm with me like you did with CA...but when you write your story, feel free to embelish the truth,,or just lie....if necessary...lol

Great read!

Thumbs UpRCC, I don't know where NEAR, Arkansas is, but it has to be a better place
having you there. Thanks for the laughs.