Thread: Pulling out all stops

Of late my fishing luck has been fairly undistinquished. The Ouija board has shown indifferent results. So with what looks to be a good weekend coming up, I have been compelled to resort to a tried and true method. I went down to Como, NC to see Dr. Mojo Junius, a root doctor of great renown. After a short chat I asked for some help. He then offered up a solution to my problem. It cost me 1 pint of Crab Orchard Bourbon, but the results were guaranteed. In case you are curious, I obtained a Spek divining rod made from a willow tree struck by lightening on the night of a full moon. Along with this I was given a potion of mandrake and High John the Conqeror Root, to be used as a bait dip. Woe unto the fish!!

Bring me a pint of bourbon & I'll show you a good place to catch them .

Half gallon of henry mckenna and i'll put you on them.

Whats the lake of choice? Ill be waiting for a detailed report

Sounds like it might work, speK, but the Doc forgot to tell yo uhow to hold your tongue!

Make sure you complete the ritual... you have to dance counterclockwise around your boat spinning clockwise and hopping on your left foot... and this MUST be done under a full moon on the second Friday the Thirteenth of the lunar year; at exactly midnight. As you circle you should be chanting....

Ahwa...... Tafull...... Eyeahm.
Ahwa...... Tafull...... Eyeahm.
Ahwa...... Tafull...... Eyeahm.
Ahwa...... Tafull...... Eyeahm.
Ahwa...... Tafull...... Eyeahm.

You should chant faster with each complete spin as you circle the boat.

To get the best reaction of this ritual, you should be wearing the traditional Fish Clan Shaman's robe made out of rusty treble hooks and the ritual should be performed in front of a large crown that has been drinking heavily.....

Yeah... Yeah..... That's the ticket.