who can relate?

Most of us over 65 were HOME SCHOOLED ... in many ways

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1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!”

4. My father taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.”

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.”

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.”

7. My father taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about.”

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!”

13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
"Stop acting like your father!”

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.”

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home.”

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING/
"You are going to get it from your father when he gets home!”

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.”

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on! Don't you think I know when you are cold?”

20. My father taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.”

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.”

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father.”

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were raised in a barn?”

24. My mother taught me WISDOM
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand.

25. My father taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids and I hope they turn out just like you

LOL, had a good laugh. I certainly relate to most of these! Ah the good days. Sure miss my parents.

I miss those days- thanks for the post!

Yep, had all that training, too!

Been there


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Ok I’m 54 and have heard each one of these , Great mom !!!!!


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As for #7, my father had another phrase for that, but I can't publish it here!

Heard everyone of those . ----------------------------------more than once .:popcorn

Quote:

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Originally Posted by duckhunter

LOL, had a good laugh. I certainly relate to most of these! Ah the good days. Sure miss my parents.

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X2!


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Yep, heard them all when I was a kid and also recited some of the list as a father. Funny how we repeat some things as parents, because I have heard my son mention those same pearls of wisdom to my grandkids over recent years.

Heard them pretty often. One that my daddy told me often was "you don't believe lard is greasy".

Figured "If he jumps off a cliff , does that mean you have too ?", would have made the list also under predictions . :biggrin

Heard some of those before for sure. Here is another one also.
My mother taught me about gardening. "With all that dirt under your neck you could grow a turnip garden."

I wonder how many more old sayings folks can come up with.

My Parents taught me about Drugs!
Drug me to Church!!

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This was a good post.

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Boy I remember all of those. Thanks for sharing.

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Thanks for sharing Steve! Brings back many fond memories!

Yep!

I remember during some whippings "this hurts me more than it hurts you".

My wife reminded me of one this morning. "I am going to knock the fire from you, if you don't get out of here". I left and went to town. I will throw my cap in the door to see if it's ok to go back in. If the cap comes sailing back out the door I know not to go back in.:Rofl