I have settled with the fact that I am a carrier of bad luck. It has been brought to my attention on a number of occasions that fish are biting, but when I get there BAM they turn off .
What I'm offering here is a service to everyone. For a small, and I do mean small, denominational fee I will stay off of your watering hole. You will be able to go fishing and bring back limits EVERY TIME. You will have bragging rights with all of your buddies. Your wife will look at you differently when you walk in the door with a stringer full of fish. You will have a phone full of pictures of limits and limits of fish to show to the guys at work. The possibility are endless.
I am even willing to be hired, by you, to go to the same watering hole as your buddy on the day that he fishes just so he will not catch any fish and you can save your hero status. Although this does cost a little extra because of potential risk of bodily harm to myself if he were to find out I was the reason for him zeroing out that day.
My fees are minor and I do give discounts to guides and retirees. I also will accept CLEANED AND FILED fish as payment. I have several references if needed by several different people who can testify as to how I can turn off the bite just by showing up at the ramp. Game wardens don't even check me when I come off the water.
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