Living life as a dinosaur

I admit it. I'm a dinosaur!! I live each day wishing I could be back in the world I grew up in and even the world my kids were raised in. I don't recognize the world today and so I don't fit in. Rarely does that make any difference. I've found the instance where it does. You are ostracized for saying one word that could be considered critical to a kid. Anybody's kid. My grandkids!

Both of my grandkids are going to be good basketball players if they continue to progress the way the are. Both are going to be tall (Mom is 5'9" and Dad is 6'8"). Being tall means your future in basketball is at power forward or center. Both are a head taller than their classmates.My son-in-law played college basketball at Vanderbilt and pro in Europe a couple of seasons. He is a wonderful teacher, coach, and Father. He is lucky enough to have a great job that affords him time most every afternoon to work with the kids at home. He has coached both of them up until this year when our Granddaughter became a 6th grader and Grandson a 4th grader.

My wife and I try to attend all their games if possible. Last Monday was my Grandson's first game. My wife was out of town so I went by myself. BIG MISTAKE!!

I'll back up. A couple of weeks ago our Granddaughter 's team played 5 games in 8 hours and won all 5, most by big scores.My wife and I were there for all of them. One was played in a large gym with very few folks in the stands. Voices carried well. During that game, my Granddaughter had ran her fastest and was standing under her basket, waiting for the guards to look up while bringing the ball up the floor. When the guard made a pass and threw the ball into the 2nd row of bleachers, I said "That was a terrible pass" to my son-in-law who was seated next to me. He instantly said "YOU CAN"T SAY THAT!!" and shook his head. I hadn't yelled it, just my normal voice in a near-empty gym. I was puzzled to say the least. They won that game handily.

Fast forward to last Monday. My grandson's team was playing in a small gym. The crowd was small. We were sitting in the bleachers with my Daughter just below. That game was less interesting than watching cat herding. The poor guards on my Grandson's team had a tough time dribbling the ball to the half line. 9 times out of 10 down the floor, they would turn it over before anybody else touched the ball. I guess too many times I made comments to the guy setting next to me. He did the same to me as did other grandparents around us.

When my wife came home late last week, she got an ear full from our daughter about how terrible it was that I had made negative comments about the game. SAY WHAT???? I guess the politically-correct thing is to now not say anything at all that could upset a kid or their parents. I wasn't being critical in my dinosaur way of thinking. I was calling it as I saw it. I heaped much more praise on the kids than negative. I went to them and told them they played a good game which was a white lie because many of them didn't.

I guess the world has moved on and left me in the past. It is now not acceptable to say anything "critical" about any of the little snowflakes because it might scar them into a life of therapy on a shrinks couch. Same applies to their parents. I guess my life of watching Grandkid's ballgames will be with a muzzle on or not at all. I seriously doubt if I will be inclined to go to many.

I guess I just have too much dinosaur in me to change completely. I just wish somebody would have warned me.

It is a shame but that is the way it is. Thanks for sharing

man I know what you mean !!! my problem is I don't care what people think about me I say what's on my mind and so be it , my wife is from the Philippines and she sometimes just wants to go and hide when say something's !!! she told family if you really don't want hear the truth about something don't ask Joe cause he is not going to sugar coat it in no means !!!:Rofl:Rofl:ThumbsUp

Well said. :cheers2

Keep telling it like it is Mr Dux !! That's what's wrong with a lot if things now days folks want speak up .too many have kelp silent to long. afraid of hurting someone's feelings. (Grin) I was raised to keep my feelings off my shoulders or someone would knock em for ya!

Blue ribbon cupcakes sure don't wanna be near me.

I have been accused of the same thing. Folks tell me that they never have to wonder where they stand with me. Fussed at one of my Gdaughters tonite for leaving a mess in our bathroom that she used while I was gone. She's 12 and kept saying that she was going to clean it up, blah, blah, blah. My old man would have called me back from Texas to clean it up!! Things are very different today and I've never been known to keep my opinions to myself, so I get corrected sometimes. I'm personally tired of everyone's rights but mine being of any value. I better quit now before I say something I shouldn't.

I know the feeling. My sweet wife tries to keep me under control but it's a tough job. Probably I should just stay up here in these woods. :dono

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Originally Posted by mrdux

I admit it. I'm a dinosaur!! I live each day wishing I could be back in the world I grew up in and even the world my kids were raised in. I don't recognize the world today and so I don't fit in. Rarely does that make any difference. I've found the instance where it does. You are ostracized for saying one word that could be considered critical to a kid. Anybody's kid. My grandkids!

Both of my grandkids are going to be good basketball players if they continue to progress the way the are. Both are going to be tall (Mom is 5'9" and Dad is 6'8"). Being tall means your future in basketball is at power forward or center. Both are a head taller than their classmates.My son-in-law played college basketball at Vanderbilt and pro in Europe a couple of seasons. He is a wonderful teacher, coach, and Father. He is lucky enough to have a great job that affords him time most every afternoon to work with the kids at home. He has coached both of them up until this year when our Granddaughter became a 6th grader and Grandson a 4th grader.

My wife and I try to attend all their games if possible. Last Monday was my Grandson's first game. My wife was out of town so I went by myself. BIG MISTAKE!!

I'll back up. A couple of weeks ago our Granddaughter 's team played 5 games in 8 hours and won all 5, most by big scores.My wife and I were there for all of them. One was played in a large gym with very few folks in the stands. Voices carried well. During that game, my Granddaughter had ran her fastest and was standing under her basket, waiting for the guards to look up while bringing the ball up the floor. When the guard made a pass and threw the ball into the 2nd row of bleachers, I said "That was a terrible pass" to my son-in-law who was seated next to me. He instantly said "YOU CAN"T SAY THAT!!" and shook his head. I hadn't yelled it, just my normal voice in a near-empty gym. I was puzzled to say the least. They won that game handily.

Fast forward to last Monday. My grandson's team was playing in a small gym. The crowd was small. We were sitting in the bleachers with my Daughter just below. That game was less interesting than watching cat herding. The poor guards on my Grandson's team had a tough time dribbling the ball to the half line. 9 times out of 10 down the floor, they would turn it over before anybody else touched the ball. I guess too many times I made comments to the guy setting next to me. He did the same to me as did other grandparents around us.

When my wife came home late last week, she got an ear full from our daughter about how terrible it was that I had made negative comments about the game. SAY WHAT???? I guess the politically-correct thing is to now not say anything at all that could upset a kid or their parents. I wasn't being critical in my dinosaur way of thinking. I was calling it as I saw it. I heaped much more praise on the kids than negative. I went to them and told them they played a good game which was a white lie because many of them didn't.

I guess the world has moved on and left me in the past. It is now not acceptable to say anything "critical" about any of the little snowflakes because it might scar them into a life of therapy on a shrinks couch. Same applies to their parents. I guess my life of watching Grandkid's ballgames will be with a muzzle on or not at all. I seriously doubt if I will be inclined to go to many.

I guess I just have too much dinosaur in me to change completely. I just wish somebody would have warned me.

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I agree with you but I think it is very slowly going back the other way.......just my opinion. Look up the video of what the Louisville womens basketball coach had to say after their loss the other night. Not exactly the same but on the same line as what you are talking about....how our world has changed.

Regards

I am in the same boat, infuriates me to no end.
I can't stand participation trophies either. Life is full of winners and losers, the sooner kids learn that the better.

Surprise them with blue participation ribbons for both teams next time. Show them you are an old fart with cooth. DP

Old fart-yes. Cooth-doubtful.

That is one thing that is surprising about the situation I posted about. My S-I-L has said several times how much he hates participation awards.

On the day I mentioned when my Granddaughter played 5 games in 8 hours, I sat near a Father of a girl on a team we didn't play while her team was on the floor. He would react to a turnover or bad shot by throwing his hands up or shaking his head then yell to his team "good try, you'll do better next time" several times, all the while gesturing to me how upset he was with how the game was going. I'm thinking is this how these kids have to be handled? I sure am glad I never attempted to coach my kids at that age. I think it was different 20+ years ago.

I am in the same boat with the rest of ya! I can embarrass the wife in a heartbeat at a game. The only sport so fat that I have witnessed that this new era hasn't ruined is high school football.
And don't even get me started on the churches version of athletic programs like Upward. There are no winners or losers.
That's what's wrong with these generations is that they do not know how to be apart of a team, manage conflict, adapt and overcome to win. Then they don't k ow what it feels like to lose, so they act out and pout.
Hence,.....the riots that have plagued our country.

I am getting off of my soapbox now. I'm with ya MRDUX, just keep doing it our way, the kids need it.

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I'm with ya MRDUX, just keep doing it our way, the kids need it.


SOMEBODY has to show them that there's more than one way for things to be done.

At 30 years old, I came up during the transition. I can remember the first time I heard about a participation trophy and I didn't understand. Trophy's were awarded to those who put in the extra effort, those who's excelled beyond the rest. We learned how to accept a defeat, how pick yourself up and move on. Were learned that losing is inevitable and not the end of the world. We learned how to work hard so we wouldn't feel the sting next time, we also learned that in life there were things that we were not good at. I learned that I couldn't catch a baseball to save my life, and my skills on the basketball court were lacking. Where as some people would applaud my effort I was never told I did great when the opposite was true. I kept trying different things until I found music. Now there was something I had a talent for. It may not have been a fancy sport but it put me through five years of college and payed for an engineering degree with no money out of my own pocket. Now, if I didn't have an honest coach or father who were both man enough to sit me down an explain that though I work hard that maybe that sport wasn't something for me, I wouldn't have kept exploring until I found my own niche. Funny thing is, I learned and still learn that those same lessons I learned back then, prepared me for the real world where no one cares about your feelings and your effort will not keep you employed if you cannot produce results. I learned when life knocks you back you man up and knuckle down, put your nose to the stone and keep grinding on.


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As a 61 year old, I'm in your boat dux. Something on those lines that also bothers me. And I speak from the experience of having grandkids. They do not have to participate in sports year round, just cause they "want" to. One of my daughter's would rather be exhausted from running her boys to games every weekend than say" no, you can't play this season, I need to rest sometimes." I'm talking parents that have jobs that take more than 40 hours a week. Kids are not going to dry up and blow away if they get told no sometimes. I had a nice fish fry planned last week that got canceled, because they forgot about having a game. When they said lets do it after 4 pm,I said no. I did not intend to be cleaning up after dark. And MidMsAngler, you sound like a young man with a good brain. I commend you.

Very nicely done d.

These parents aren't doing these kids any favors by coddling them to no end. One day you have to grow up and go out into the real world where people aren't going to pay you for just participating. I promise, I can't find any kid under 25 that is willing to work for a living. Had one kid (23) tear up when I yelled at him for almost killing a very expensive piece of equipment. He started balling when I fired him on his next screw up. Competitive drive is what made this country great once. I fear that we're on a one way trip to the bottom nowadays. Wonder why China and Japan are kicking butts and taking names?

Be careful guys...you might OFFEND one of the little darlings..If people don't like what I say they can walk away before they offend me....

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Originally Posted by "D"

. And MidMsAngler, you sound like a young man with a good brain. I commend you.

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I can assure you it was not something with which I was born. It was a direct result of tough but responsible parenting, mentoring, and leadership. An early love for fishing has kept me out of a lot of trouble, too.


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Quote:

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Originally Posted by MidMsAngler

An early love for fishing has kept me out of a lot of trouble, too.

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Amen to that !! I could have very well ended up in prison or dead, if it hadn't been for "fishing" !!

My 85 year old dad and I had a similar discussion this past weekend. There was a time when we thought we were "normal" and the politically correct were the kooks.

Great post

Like several of you have said, sports didn't git it for me. If you weren't playing AA class ball, don't go to the corner lot and expect to get in on a game. I was raised in a Scouting family and that taught me a lot of what kept me from the trouble some of my friends found. I used to take a backpack and my tackle box, an old Plano, would just slide down inside it. Add a lunch and hold my rod in my hand while I rode the bike to fish for the day while the folks worked during the summer. Now the parents have to take kids wherever they need to go so that they can be confident that someone doesn't scoop them up or hospitalize them before dinner. Yes folks, things have greatly changed.

Update:

I went to one of my Grandaughter's basketball games Saturday. I sort of sneaked in and tried my best to be a good boy. She played one of her best games ever but my being there had zero to do with that. My wife was really glad I went and said she was proud of my behavior. I'm going to try to be less critical but changing completely is not an option at my age. Biting my tongue is not one of my favorite past times.