Rumor threatening significant impact to Jordan Lake, and surrounding bodies of water
Crappie.com community,
There's a rumor going around that a certain someone who has not been on the water in his own boat since October, 2013 may be back on the water again soon as a boat owner. The individual is described as a white male, 33 years old, 5'7" tall, mostly bald, kind of nerdy, and speaking with an awkward midwestern/southern hybrid accent. There is not yet any physical evidence backing this claim, but because of its potential immediate and long-term impact to Jordan Lake, a "Raleigh Area Lake", and other surrounding bodies of water, I will personally investigate this. If the rumor is confirmed, I will provide photographic proof Monday evening.
Please, if anyone feels they have information on this individual, PM me the exact coordinates to your ten best tournament fishing spots, along with tackle used, depth fished, and optimal water temp for each location. I will store your data safely in an encrypted Lowrance data storage unit until this rumor has been clarified.
Thank you for your attention and cooperation in this matter,
crataegus