blond joke

The other day my neighbor Donna, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway just jumping for joy! I didn't know why she was jumping for joy. I thought, what the heck, and I started jumping up and down along with her.

She said, "I have some really great news!"

I said, "Great. Tell me why you're so happy"

She stopped jumping and breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, told me that she was pregnant!

I knew that she had been trying for a while so I told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier for you!"

Then she said, "There's more."

I asked, "What do you mean 'more'?"

She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby. We are going to have twins!"

Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked her how she knew. She said...(You're going to love this!)

"That was the easy part. I went to Walmart and they actually had a home pregnancy kit in a twin-pack. Both tests came out positive!"

Subject: Tree Hugger
A woman from , who was a tree hugger and an anti-hunter,
purchased several acres of Hill Country land, near .
There was a huge tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted
to view the natural splendor of her land, so she climbed the tree. As she
neared the top, she encountered a spotted owl. It attacked her! In her
haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the ground. The ensuing
fall imbedded several splinters of wood in her crotch.

In considerable pain, she hurried to the nearest doctor, 35 minutes
away. She told him she was an environmentalist and anti-hunter, and how she
came to receive all of the splinters. The doctor listened to her story with
great patience. He then told her to go into the examining room and he would
see if he could help. The impatient patient sat, and waited for three hours
before the doctor reappeared.

The angry woman demanded, 'What took you so long?'

He smiled and said, 'Well, I had to apply for permits from the US
Environmental Service, and Wildlife, and Keep
Beautiful before I could remove old-growth timber from a recreational area.
I'm sorry, but they turned me down.'

lol,,,,great jokes!!!!

LMAO....Not bad for clean jokes...

Good one!:D

i have a blond joke but please donttell mu wife i called her that =p