A friend in Alabama sent me these funny sayings...
He’s about as handy as a back pocket on a shirt.
He was as mad as a mule chewing on bumblebees!
“It’s hotter than two rats humpin’ in a wool sock”
He’s a good ol’dog, but sometimes he sh*ts too close to the porch
Want in one hand…spit (or SHIP) in the other…see which fills up first
Ain’t nothing open after midnight, but legs.
he could tear up a steel ball.
Faster than a hound’ll suck an egg!
It’s hotter than a bitch in heat.
that boy wouldn’t holler sooey if the hogs was eatin’ eem.
It’s hotter than forty hells
That gumbo will make a Chihuahua break a chain
That tastes like eatin’ a lard sandwich in a outhouse.
She’s pretty as a pumpkin and half as smart.
So ugly his mama had to borrow a baby when she went to church.
Hangin in there like a hair in a biscuit
My wife is so cold when she spreads her legs the furnace kicks on
I look like I was sent for and couldn’t go. (I look bad)
Uglier than a lard bucket full of armpits
It tastes so bad ya gotta lick the cat’s A$$ to get the taste outta yer mouth
I’ll slap you and not even tell you why!
takin’ the browns to the super bowl (taking a dump)
Hotter than door knobs/hinges in hell.
“She cain’t help bein’ugly, …but she coulda stayed at home!”
