They are out there

[Minnerman]

Idiot sighting.

I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00
I said "May I have large bills, please"

She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same size."
When I got up off the floor I explained it to her....

IDIOTSIGHTING
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
He said, 'NO, it's not..' Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes Iknow, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.
She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'
The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING
I live in a semi rural area.
We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office
to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.
The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!
I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

From Kingman , KS

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.
-- From Kansas City

IDIOT SIGHTING
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

IDIOT SIGHTING
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS

IDIOT SIGHTING
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,'
our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.'
Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

IDIOT SIGHTING
How would you pronounce this child's name? "Le-a"

Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.
This child attends a school in Kansas City , Mo.
Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong.
It's pronounced "Ledasha".
When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."

SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember to pronounce the dash.
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent.


STAY ALERT!

They walk among us......and they VOTE

[tritonman]

those were plum funny and scary at the same time

[crappiholic]

This happened to Deb and I at the Coleman's BBQ in Hernando week before last.
Pulled up to Colemans with boat behind my truck. Walked in to order. While we were looking at the menu on the wall, the clerk ask "Have y'all been fishing?" Now remember this, I've got 12 14' trolling poles attached to the side. I looked at just as serious as I could be and said "No, we've been riding around looking for eagles" and her reply was "There's a bunch of them around".
And to top it all off, there was a little old sweet lady walked up to the counter and ask "What's on a BBQ plate?" I said "fried sardines and your choice of potatoe salad, slaw, or baked beans".

[DonDon]

My wife hooked me up with the airport thing on our last trip to Houston to her her family. We got everything packed and she forgot to put her toiletry bag in the regular suitcase so she stuffed it into another bag. Course I didn't know this and when we got to the airport, we checked our big suitcase and went to the line to get through security. SIR, could you please come with us.HUH? Sir, could you please step over here. OH CRAP, here we go. I got over to the counter and they opened my carry on bag and low and behold, there was her toiletry bag with shampoo, hair stray and all the other regular items in it. Talk about getting caught off guard. LOL

[Wannabe...]

I can top all of you.

Last week, DD said he was going to outfish me at the FJ.

Wannabe...

[tritonman]

he did out fish you, you just out caught him..lol

[DonDon]

Amen Triton, I was thinking to much and me and thinking shouldn't be used in the same sentence

[DonDon]

That's 2 times in 15 tries though so I can't complain

[jvg]

Hay i can beat some of them.....a couple of years ago i was in a gro. store in Greenwood and when i paid the clerk she gave me back my change and i was counting it as she gave it back, when she got through i said that's not right so she gave me another dollar back and i said again that's not right so she gave me another dollar back i just looked at her and shook my head and then she started to hand me another dollar back and i said you gave me to much the first time......

[oleblue]

funny this came up I went checkers today for lunch ordered my food total was $11.98 got to the window gave the guy a $20.00 he gave me $15.02 I looked at it looked at him said this ant right he told me he knows how to count . Needles to say i just kept it i just didn't feel like giving a math lesson at the drive thru window.