Had a TORCH moment last night

[DonDon]

Yeh, you KNOW where this is leading and I'll TRY to type this where it don;t get deleted but ya never know. Delete away IF I get to bad G-3.
I got home and ate me a turkey sammich before I headed outside to do all the things on my get ready for camp list plus a few other things. Went out with the garden weisel and worked in a couple rows so I could plant me some sweet corn, Okra and Butternut squash. Kewl, got that done in record time, bout an hour. Plenty of time left to do all the other things I needed to do. Went over to the boat, crawled into it and was hooking up the charger to the TM batteries. For some reason the inline charger which has a plug in on it, just ain't ginning any more. HOPE it's just a lose wire but for now, it's a no go. I put me a piece of board on my seat, then sat the Charger on the board and was leaning over to hook the clips to the battery posts when it happened. Grumble, Grumble, HUMMMMM, I thought to myself, I MAY need to get to the restroom purty quick, something just ain't right about that FEELING right there. Lean back over and OOOHHH CRAP, man, I Gots to go. Let me tell you one thing, when you HAVE to go and real soon, NEVER jump off the side of your boat, bout 4 feet up and land solid with both feet on the ground. That sudden jolt will cause things to dislodge from one place and lodge in another place that you really don't want them to. LOL Here I am out by the street, feet turned out and me trying to skootch across the yard and into the house before it gets worse. Guess what, I DIDN'T MAKE IT. I had to duck in behind the first gate which puts me behind the hot tub area and a hidden fence corner. Off come the drawers which are already kinda jacked up and to squating I go. You can picture this with my hands on the ground in front of me for balance. HUMMM, no TP either. What to do, what to do? Then that light bulb goes off. Ever heard of a redneck Bidet? Yep, Water hose with a sprayer works real good. Just be careful to NOT have it set to JET, OUCH man, that hurt. LOL

[Wannabe...]

Just shovel it in the garden before Nessa finds it on accident and you'll be OK.

BTW, whens the last time you had your gall bladder checked?

Wannabe...

[torch]

I laughed like Jim Carey in Dumb and Dumber when you called last night.

[DonDon]

Torch, man I KNEW you'd appreciate that so I just HAD to give ya a buzz.

[Wannabe...]

I'd give a dolla for a recording of that phone call to post on youtube.

Wannabe...

[old fuzzy]

Bad Gobbler Samwich,,be My Guess,,,(:-)

KINDA LIKE THE OLD SAYING
40 YARDS TO THE OUT HOUSE! BY WILL-E-MAKE IT
ILLSTURATED BY,,,,, BET -HE - CAINT!!

[soswine]

Pocket knife would have called them jacked up drawers into duty. Just be sure they get buried deeper than the the tiller tines.

[crappieman101]

I got a great one to tell but better save it for the camp...don't think it would fit on here....happened last Sunday....ouch

[old fuzzy]

Wonder If The Saying (where Bambi Goes Nothing Grows) Applys Here

[Minnerman]

Are you sayin as you get up in age that pucker string don't work like it should?