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Thread: Redneck farm kid in the Marines - read to the END.

  1. #1
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    Default Redneck farm kid in the Marines - read to the END.


    Dear Ma and Pa,
    I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.
    I was restless at first because you get to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m. But I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.
    Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on coffee. Their food, plus yours, holds you until noon when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.
    We go on 'route marches,' which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us.. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A 'route march' is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks..
    The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.
    This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges They come in boxes.
    Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake ... I only beat him once.. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6' and 130 pounds and he's 6'8' and near 300 pounds dry.
    Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.
    Your loving daughter,
    Alice

  2. #2
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    BWAAHAAA Good One. Sounds like one of Larry the cable guy's sisters.

  3. #3
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    That's awesome!

  4. #4
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    I love it.
    Hey novice, I was working in your neck of the woods Wed. and Friday I think, south of Glasgow on hwy. 87
    Last edited by rugsrme; 09-20-2009 at 12:15 PM. Reason: Can't spell Glasgow
    http://www.facebook.com/quinn.noldner

  5. #5
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    Rugs... that's very close. Depending on how far south you went, you had some major hills and curves on hwy 87.

  6. #6
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    county rd. 316, worked for the Tailors, they live on some beautiful lakes.
    http://www.facebook.com/quinn.noldner

  7. #7
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    You were into the hills and curves, big-time. LOL We live north of Glasgow in the boonies.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crappie Novice View Post
    You were into the hills and curves, big-time. LOL We live north of Glasgow in the boonies.
    True, very hilly and curvy, beautiful there though. It was in the "boonies" too, since the closest town was "Boonsboro" after all
    http://www.facebook.com/quinn.noldner

  9. #9
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    B'boro is a metropolis compared to Lisbon. You were "out there". The dueling banjos theme keeps coming to mind.

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